Heart to Heart Conversations

Sometimes in life there are those moments where words are left unsaid. They are thought but never uttered for various reasons. This reason is typically based in fear (of rejection, of hurting the other person, of just sounding plain silly). We also hold words in for fear of exposing our true selves, even to those we love the most. I know I am guilty of doing this. I suspect (or hope I suppose) that we all do this.
Then comes the time when things have to be said, they have to be aired or they eat away at you. These are the things you come to realize should have been said in the moment but once again you held back. Last night we (hubby and myself) had one of those conversations. The kind that I cry through as I say all of the awful things I can't bear to even hear outloud and as I say them they twist like a knife in my heart. These are things that need to be said for my own fragile sanity yet they hurt.
The amazing thing to me is that all of the things I am afraid to say my husband can handle. He doesn't crumble into pieces and he still loves me (even if I think I am hurting him). Even after 10 years of marriage he still amazes me. So is our marriage perfect? No, but is marriage ever perfect? Is our marriage worth working at and making better, absolutely. So I will try. I will be honest with myself; I will be honest with my husband. I am sure that I will cry again but it makes us stronger. Us - together - as it was meant to be.